Heartache
I don’t know how biology explains it, but whenever I am truly hurting, the pain doesn’t stay in my head.
It travels straight to my chest.
It physically, genuinely aches.
It’s a heavy, suffocating pressure.
Almost like an invisible hand wrapping around my ribs, slowly squeezing the air out of my lungs.
They say it happens when you experience deep emptiness, rejection, and despair following the loss of someone you loved.
And that explains my entire reality right now.
Seeing the only person I ever truly loved in my life change completely and leave me behind in the darkness.
It broke something so deep inside me that my body doesn’t know how else to carry it.
- I miss the smell of her hair.
- I miss the warmth of her touch.
- I miss looking into her eyes.
- I miss her lips that I used to kiss.
- I miss the way she used to talk to me.
- I miss how clingy she was with me.
- I miss how safe she felt opening her entire world to me.
Now, I have become a complete stranger to her.
Seeing someone like her change in the blink of an eye gave my brain an unbearable amount of shock.
The pain was so intense that my mind gave up, and my body was forced to bear the weight.
I crave her every single day.
Even after being hurt and disrespected a thousand times.
Every time she crosses my mind, which is every second of the day.
My chest tightens all over again.
It feels like my ribs are about to burst from the pressure.
And my throat burns from swallowing every word, every question, and every feeling I never got to express to her.